Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers?
He'll stop at nothing to avoid them.
Why is it called a litter of puppies?
What do you call a big fish who makes you an offer you can't refuse?
What did the dad say when his child asked, "Can you put my shoes on?"
What farm animal is best at karate?
Which mixed drink is always in a bad mood?
What's a vegetable's favorite game to play?
What do you give a dog on a hot summer day?
Why don't the McDonald's® arches like the Arc de Triomphe?
What did Michael Jordan sell at the farmers market?
What do actors and people who leave voicemails have in common?
What's the name of Scrooge's brother with bad allergies?
What was the slogan for Santa's Elves' new business?
What should a football team do if the pitch is flooded?
What did the pen say to the pencil?
What does a queen bee do when she burps?
What did the shower say to the toilet?
Why do baseball players always go to the park?
When you die, what part of the body dies last?
Why did the cats ask for a drum set?
What kind of pants do fish wear?