What did the kittens do to their new owner's house?
My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing him...
What's a frisbee's favorite type of music?
Why are cats terrible at telling stories?
What animal always gets on everyone's nerves?
How did the farmer fix his torn overalls?
Why was the alien always crashing his ships?
What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite toy?
Why is spending NYE in Times Square overrated?
Why did the mare gain weight?
Which position in soccer always plans for the future?
Why didn't the dog want to play football?
What did the computer do at lunchtime?
Why do librarians never make plans?
How do you motivate a watch to go to work?
What animal makes the best lunches?
What makes pirates such good singers?
What do you call a hike across the universe?
What did the father say when his daughter told him she'd call him later?
What do the undead use for virtual meetings?